Here’s my High-Low this week. It was a week filled with sweetness, gratitude, love and light and a little bit of sadness. I just consider myself lucky that I get to feel the entire range of emotions. I’m realizing that there are many people who either physically can’t feel these emotions or have blocked themselves to where they’re devoid of feeling emotions on such a scale. So while that means that I’ll have my share of ups and downs over the years, it also means that I’ll be able to continue to share my High-Lows with you all. Lucky ducks…
HIGH: SWEETER THAN A CUPCAKE
This past Saturday morning, I showed up at the Dermalogica headquarters in Carson, California to participate in Step Up Women’s Network “I Dream To…” Mentor Day. I am a visionary member of Step Up Women’s Network and am a big fan because their sole mission is to help inspire girls from under-resourced communities to live up to their full potential. They have done this so effectively that 100% of Step Up graduates over the past 4 years have been accepted to and currently attend college.
I had no idea what to expect and to be honest, I was a little nervous. But after meeting my mentee, “S.”, all of my nervousness went away. We were very different and yet we had qualities at our cores in common which bonded us.
My goal going into the day was to encourage, inspire and motivate her. So imagine my surprise, after spending the day together when I was the one tearing up as I read her letter of gratitude to me and realizing how much she had taught me.
I learned more from this 15-year-old in one day than I have learned from most people in the past month. And by sharing with her some of my successes, struggles and strategies, I actually learned lessons that I didn’t even know I needed to learn.
I am so thankful to have met S. and to have been able to share this day together. My hope is that she took as much away from the day with me as I took from my time spent with her.
LOW: SITTING WITH SADNESS
This past week – like so many other weeks we have in life – I had a bump in the road. I felt sad, disappointed, confused and totally out of my comfort zone. As the extrovert that I am, my initial instinct was to pick up the phone and call a close friend. Usually, that’s what I do. I call my Mom or call or hang out with one of my best friends and share my woes with anyone that I trust. I tell them what’s going on so they can help me work through it and by the end of the call or visit, I get over it and feel better…somewhat.
But this time was different. As I was picking up the phone, I remembered that chat that Louis C.K. had on Conan about cell phones, sadness and basically how it all ties back into our fear of sadness and our fear of being alone. He told a story about getting really sad in his car while listening to Bruce Springsteen’s “Jungleland” (best song ever!!) and how his first instinct was to text like 50 people. But instead of doing that, he took contrary action and just let the sadness hit him like a truck and pulled over and bawled his eyes out. He said that afterwards, he actually felt better because it was like there were antibodies of happiness that came along to counter the extreme sadness.
So, I tried it. I sat in the sadness and let it take me over. I cried like a baby on my bed. I let myself feel out of control. And, well, it worked. I’m not saying that it made me feel all better but it certainly helped me get a little bit more comfortable in my own skin that day. And I truly feel blessed that I get to have those sad moments because they make the happy ones that much sweeter.
BF Asks: What was your High-Low this week?
*So what exactly is a High-Low, you ask? High-Low is the BEST & WORST part of your day, week, month, etc. I started this tradition with friends & family after I discovered it through a movie decades ago. Not only is it useful for reflection sake but it is also an excellent way to communicate with your spouse, kids or friends over the dinner table. By introducing this tradition to folks, parents have told me that their kids have opened up more and friends have told me that their spouses have become more communicative. Try it for yourself and let me know what your experience is!