Dear Dawn: “I’m 15, and recently had my heart broken by a guy I was in love with…”

From a 15-year-old reader, V.C.: Help with heartbreak

From a 15-year-old reader, V.C.: Help with heartbreak

Dear Dawn, I came across your “Dear 15 Me” and all I can say is thank you. I’m currently a 15 year old sophomore in high school and I’ve read some of the different advice from people and they’re truly amazing. I’ve recently just had my heart broken from a guy I was in love with ( or thought I was in love with) it’s been pretty tough, considering that we go to the same school and I see him around. After seeing all these posts, they’ve really hit me in a positive way. I’m just wondering if there is any advice you can kindly give to me, I would appreciate it . Thank you (: – V.C.
Dear, V.C.!

Thank you SO much for writing me!
I started Dear 15 Me to reach out to girls just like you, hoping that it would help make a difference.
Listen. I remember how hard this time is.
It is TOUGH. But, honey, it gets sooooo much better.
You have everything in front of you, and you have no idea all of the beautiful surprises that will come your way. And, believe me, there will be many.
Things you can’t even imagine happening right now, will be the very things that change your life for the better.
I personally believe that people are put in our lives at a certain time to teach us lessons at that time and to go along on this journey of life with us.
And, I also believe that those very same people step out of our lives when they are supposed to, to make room for better things…even if we can’t see them right then.
One poem, my mom inscribed in a book she gave me as a Christmas present when I was high school, has always stuck with me, and I hope you get as much from it to help you heal your heart, as I have over the years.
In fact, I have found that one line or another always sticks out to me, and helps me get through a painful time of transition.
Thank you so much for reaching out.
You made my holiday season, and truly touched my heart.
Remember this at all times, V.C.: 
YOU WILL BE OKAY.
 
xoxo,
Dawn
****
“After A While” by Veronica A. Shoffstall

After A While 

(Veronica A. Shoffstall, copyright 1971)

After a while, you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. and you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t always mean security.

And you begin to learn
that kisses aren’t contracts
and presents aren’t promises.
And you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build all your roads on today
because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have a way of falling down
in mid-flight.

 

After a while, you learn
that even sunshine burns
if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure,
you really are strong,
you really do have worth,
and you learn,
and you learn – 
with every goodbye, you learn…

 

*NOTE: I am NOT a doctor. I am simply a person, who is navigating this world and life, right alongside everybody else. If you have a question for Dear Dawn, please email me at DearDawn@BeautyFrosting.com. xoxo

*Lipstick pictured above: Tarte Cosmetics Tarteist Lip Paint in Hangry & Tarteist lip crayon in Squad

Dawnspiration: To Move Forward, You Must Look Back

L O O K. B A C K.

Dawnspiration: To move forward, you must look back.

Dawnspiration: To move forward, you must look back.

Oh, resolutions.

The most popular resolution besides weight loss?

Decluttering our lives.

But, for many of us, we’ve set this resolution before, only to see it failed to be resolved come next year’s end. Here’s the thing. Your environment reflects what’s going on inside you. Let me say that again.

YOUR ENVIRONMENT REFLECTS WHAT’S GOING ON INSIDE OF YOU.

If you have a cluttered home, chances are that you’ve got a cluttered heart, cluttered head, or both. I’m happy to report that there’s a solution that has been proven to work time and time again, for everyone.

To move forward and step into our best future, we have to look into our past. We have to take an inventory of what is either haunting us or holding us back. We have to see the behavior we continue to repeat that leads us to getting the same undesirable results. And, we have to see why we’re “stuck” there, so we can get unstuck.

I have encountered quite a few people in life who have no problem detoxing their bodies for days, but find detoxing their souls a little more daunting. I have had these same people tell me that they don’t believe in therapy or self-help or soul-searching or have tried it before and “it’s not for them.”

Well, you don’t have to believe in it, you just have to DO it.

And, I highly recommend getting a guide to help you along with this decluttering – whether it be a therapist, minister, yoga teacher, spiritual leader, reiki master, 12-step group, self-help book or trusted friend. Because, if we go alone on this intense-yet-rewarding journey of finding ourselves, sometimes all we find ourselves is lost.

So, find a partner to guide you on this soul-decluttering journey and take the first step to a world of infinite possibilities. By clearing out the clutter – and the wounds, heartaches and problems – of the past, you get much more comfortable with your present, and can make room for a beautiful future.

Mistaken Adventures Are The Best Kind Of Adventures…

Sometimes mistaken adventures are the best kind of adventures...

Sometimes mistaken adventures are the best kind of adventures…

I have many a golden Lindsey memory that shine in my mind: late night parties with giant stuffed teddy bears and an impromptu Bill Withers dance party at the Lyric Theatre on a weeknight rank high.

But, this was the first one where we set off on a mistaken adventure and ended up bathed in golden light at sunset in a pumpkin patch on a farm.

Bathed in the harvest glow.

Bathed in the harvest glow.

 

Yes, I got the date wrong (SO wrong) on the charity dinner for my beloved Max Love Project, so my dear friend, Lindsey Vaerst and I drove all the way to Tanaka Farms in Irvine, only to find out that it’s…wait for it…in OCTOBER!! Ahhh. Didn’t even get the day right! (It’s October 24th NOT September 26th and tickets can be bought HERE for $150/person.)

Some might be frustrated or feel that a 3-hour round trip down the 405 is wasted time. Not us. We laughed. Oh, how we laughed! And then we took a picture, bathed in that gorgeous dusk light, to mark the moment – as though we could ever forget!

#MercuryRetrogradeIsReal #HonestLovesMax

9/11: Healing, Reflecting and Destiny

Reflecting today on 9/11 with Kelsey Patel

Reflecting today on 9/11 with Kelsey Patel

Where are you reflecting upon 9/11 today? This is where I am. On a rooftop in downtown LA with this one. This is Kelsey J Patel. She is the most magical, loving and inspirational person I’ve ever met. She is a renowned healer, here in Los Angeles. And, she is also someone I am proud to call my dear friend. She will be hosting a 9/11 guided meditation on Periscope (as @KelseyJpatel) at 4 pm PST today to bring some peace and healing to everyone who needs it. Today, Kelsey brought in 2 of the most beautiful crystals – crystals that heal, protect, cleanse & promote love. After our session, I told her I felt compelled to take a picture of her and her Labyrinth’ish matching crystals and dress.

We went outside on her downtown penthouse balcony,and we felt such an energy in regards to 9/11. At that moment, a plane flew overhead. That’s where I am today.

But, where were you on September 11, 2001?

I was in LA, where it felt like a ghost town – like a chapter from Stephen King’s The Stand. There was so much sadness. So much pain. So many prayers. So many lost souls just wandering around. I watched the news come in with my friends Sarah & Ned Brower at our friend Craig Weaver’s apartment.

That night, I went to my new roommate’s boyfriend’s house in Laurel Canyon, where I ended up meeting what would become my band – and my family – for the next four years, Hawkeye. We all listened to my bandmate singing Fire and Rain, and I knew we would never be able to think of that song the same way again.

When I recall that heartbreak of a day, I remember both how empty the world felt and how full my heart was.

I had found my people.

And yet life as we knew it would never be the same.

Many lives would never be the same.

On 9/11, people were brought together forging destinies they never even knew they were meant to have – some destinies being brutally taken away and other destinies being discovered.

Today, as I reflect with @KelseyJpatel, I pray for all of those who lost loved ones on that fateful day.

I pray for those who will never heal. And, I also pray for those who have yet to find their destinies.

But, most of all, I pray for purpose, for patience & for peace.

xoxo,

Foodie Friday: Paleta Catering – A Marriage between Healthy & Sinful

Here’s the conundrum.

Picture it. My BeautyFrosting 2nd Bloggiversary. April 16th, 2014.

Just a few of the 70 fab-fashionista-fit-foodie bloggers at the shindig. What-oh what- to do? Photo by Drunken Pixel

You have 70 bloggers as guests. Fashionistas – who are foodies – who are fit – who are fabulous…who also have to be photograph-ready at all times. And you also have cocktails. And, um, cake.

So corndogs and pizza are definitely out of the question. But what you do when you have a houseful of nutritionally-minded mavens who are hungry but don’t want to blow their diets and want to be healthy but don’t want to sacrifice taste?

Well, there’s only one way to turn – my godsend –  Paleta.

The Paleta spread: When Healthy Meets Sinful. Pacific Rim Chicken & Tofu Satay with Spicy Peanut Sauce, Local & Imported Cheese Board, Crudite with Assorted Hummus and Greek Yogurt Dip and Paleta Power-Up Chewy Bites *Photo by Takahiro Watanabe

 

I’ve been a fan of Paleta for a while now – ever since I met Chef Kelly and learned about her passion for pleasing the palate while promoting health through healing. What sort of healing? The kind of healing that comes from eating farm-to-table fresh and filling your body with whole foods.

Paleta Crudité with Lemon Hummus, Sundried Hummus and Greek Yogurt Dip. Um, You know, "Taste the rainbow?" Well, this truly IS tasting the rainbow - but of farm fresh veggies rather than high fructose corn syrup. Photo by Takahiro Watanabe

My guests couldn’t stop gushing about the eats. I was shocked at how much these girls could put back. Sorry, y’all, just speaking the truth here. It was refreshing to see my fashionista friends ACTUALLY EATING at a party. It’s a rarity – like seeing Bigfoot or something. But, yep, that’s how good it was.

Paleta Pacific Rim Thai Chicken & Tofu Satay with Spicy Peanut Sauce *Photo by Takahiro Watanabe

I did have one complaint though. My guests ate ALL the satay and I never got a taste!!! I was craving it so much after hearing everyone rave about it that I actually just ate a spoonful of the spicy peanut sauce. Oh, don’t you judge.

Next up for me? After a month of Coachella, trips to Palm Springs and events galore (see aforementioned cake and cocktails), I’m gonna give Paleta Home Meal Delivery a try. At the very least, I’ll be giving myself the gift of health and at best, I may lose a few pounds so I can be a swimmie siren this summer. Lofty goals, I know, but I really do think Paleta can help me get there!

Thanks so much, Chef Kelly and Paleta for being a BIG part of my very special day!

 

xoxo,
BF

BF Asks: Which Paleta delicacy are you most craving now?

High-Low 9/9/13: Neighbor-Family & New Scars

It has been faaaaaar too long since I shared a High-Low with you and, well, it’s time. These past few months have been such a wonderful, whimsical whirlwind – filled with travel, friends, family, rich opportunities, closing old chapters and – more importantly  – starting new ones. I have been to Texas and back, Nashville and back (more on that in another post), thought I was moving, found out I didn’t have to move, met new people, said goodbye to friends, hosted events and started becoming more involved in some philanthropic organizations that I care about deeply. But there’s no way, I can share all of the highs with you so we’ll just concentrate on the High-Low from the past week. Hope you enjoy! And I can’t wait to share more with you on a more regular basis, again.

HIGH: Neighbor-Family

After almost having to move out of my beloved home in July, I appreciate my neighbor-family now more than ever. Whether it be morning coffee with Hope across the street, laughing with Jenn as we organize my kitchen, Matty keeping me company with a glass of rosé and conversation while I frost cupcakes on a Saturday afternoon, having dinner at our neighborhood wine bar, Chic, with my old friend Sarah or Nora and Lucy bringing their laughter-filled light into my room as I get ready for a night out on the town, I am overwhelmed by the sense of family these friends give me.

So much so that they are not just friends anymore, they are my sister-neighbors and brother-neighbors…my neighbor family. And I love them to bits! Every morning I get to look out my window and say hello to these beautiful people. And every night, I get to see at least one of them before I turn in. It feels a bit like college and a bit like a small, southern town and it adds up to the warmest community I have ever lived in. I am so grateful for every second I get with them.

High: My Neighbor-Family

 

LOW: A New Scar

I have always wished I was more graceful. When I say this to people, they think I’m being modest, “But you are such a graceful and gracious lady”, I am told. Au contraire, my friends. While I am lucky that it doesn’t happen every day – or even every month – my life has been filled with its share of pratfalls and Three Stooges-style tripping accidents. So I wasn’t surprised at all when I was in a hurry at The Grove last Tuesday and totally bit it as I made my way up the stairs at The Apple store. Ugh. I gashed my knee pretty hideously. First, I was mortified…and then, I thought I might have to get stitches. I had no time for stitches! I had a manicure…and a meeting! Bless my heart.

Sorry for the graphic nature, folks...

Turns out I was okay. More or less. So why was I in such a hurry? Because there are lots of new beginnings on my horizon right now. New, fun, exciting and delicious things that I can’t wait to wake up to every morning. And, at the same time, there are also old chapters being closed. So, when I was asked by a doctor if I wanted plastic surgery, I said, “No, I think I’m gonna let this be a scar.” Scars are excellent reminders for us as humans. In this case, I feel like this scar will remind me that for new things to begin, we often have to get hurt, let ourselves heal and scab over before we can begin anew again. So while this is a low, it’s also an excellent jumping off point into the great unknown. And I am ready for all it has to bring.

 

xoxo,
BF

 

BF Asks: What was your High-Low this week? 

*So what exactly is a High-Low, you ask? High-Low is the BEST & WORST part of your day, week, month, etc. I started this tradition with friends & family after I discovered it through a movie decades ago. Not only is it useful for reflection sake but it is also an excellent way to communicate with your spouse, kids or friends over the dinner table. By introducing this tradition to folks, parents have told me that their kids have opened up more and friends have told me that their spouses have become more communicative. Try it for yourself and let me know what your experience is!