Putting on my power suit…

Standing in my power…finally.

Standing in my power…finally.

Today, as I dressed in this “power suit” for a day of meetings, I was reminded that it is International Women’s Day.
I find it charmingly ironic that is also my father’s 76th birthday.
Not exactly the biggest advocate of feminism, this man who would be the first man I was to meet on this journey here on earth, was a larger-than-life personality, often described as taking up all the space in a room, always full of ideas…and my first symbol of what power was.
And, I was born into this world, stamped by a likeness to my father…and I despised it.
His power and self-assuredness at all costs scared me.
I looked like him.
I talked a lot like him.
I had a flair for dramatic delivery like him.
I was a lover of music like him.
I was strong like him.
I was a people person like him.
I liked being the center of attention like him.
And it all frightened me.
Our longtime family friends will remember how tears would stream down my face, and my bottom lip would pout out in protest, when people would tell me at age 3 that I looked just like my father.
Because there was nothing worse to me than that.
I was scared of him.
I was scared to be like him.
And, while many argued that I got the best parts of him, not a morsel of it did I want.
Recalling my protesting pout now, I realize that it wasn’t just because of a fear of my father, but more so…a fear of myself.
No, I wanted to be like my mother – unassumingly beautiful, soft, smart, ladylike, shy, and demure.
And, alas, I was none of these things.
I am most definitely not demure.
I am strong,
I am brave,
I’m a survivor,
I’m an inspirer,
I’m a creator.
But, demure?
No. That’s not my lot in this life.
That’s best left for someone else to be – a girl, perhaps, who has yet to learn her purpose, or a woman who recognizes – and embraces – that demureness is HER strength…her power.
Now, I see that perhaps my mom has gained some of my strength.
While I never learned her knack for knowing when to speak, or how to be shy and demure, perhaps something even more pivotal happened. Perhaps with my birth, my mom learned how to stand in her own power.
And, I have come to stand proudly in my inherited personal power, strength,  dynamism and “too-muchness”.
I now thank both God – and, my dad – for these traits, and I thank years of experiences for giving me the realization that these are indeed gifts, and not the curses I always deemed them to be.
And, after 38 years of being scared of my own power, I now can wear a power suit, and feel right at home.
Here’s to all women worldwide not only standing in their power, but embracing it…and maybe even stepping into a power suit every now and then.

Never too early for sweets…not when you’re The Actor’s Diet!

Donuts & The Actors Diet? Seems like a dichotomy, but it isn't.

Donuts & The Actors Diet? Seems like a dichotomy, but it isn’t.

It was so sweet of my dear friend, Lynn Chen, editor of The Actor’s Diet blog to ask me to be the guest today on her The Actor’s Diet podcast…so I thought some sweets from SK Donuts (on 3rd street in LA) were in order.

After all, donuts always make an early morning gab session go great!

p.s. I’ll be sure to let y’all know when the podcast goes live! But ’til then, go check out her prior guests.



Monday Gratitude: Light a candle and burn the fear away! Thank you, Matt Marr!

Host, comedian, actor, counselor and life coach, Matt Marr, is not only a good friend and neighbor to me but he is also one of my biggest daily doses of inspiration.


Matt Marr - a little like St.Francis. With Ebony & Ivory - his pup, Sophie Louise and my pup, Miss Ellie. The pups are BFFs but Miss Ellie can sometimes turn into Rachel McAdams from Mean Girls.



He’s one of those people who inspires you and warms your heart with just a smile and a “Hey, Sugar”. And he’s a champion of mine – and of all who know him – who believes in you and brings out the best in you. I’m so grateful to know him.

So when I was feeling a little nervous last week about some upcoming meetings, I called Matt. Rather than just giving me a few words and sending me on my way, he said he was going to come by on Saturday morning and we would have a little preparatory pow-wow. And boy, did we!

When he shared this bit of meditative wisdom, I knew I had to share it with you guys. We started with a brief meditation and we all know I don’t usually take time – or shut up long enough – to meditate. But it was the lighting of a candle – and Matt’s words – that  most helped me.


Light a candle, burn fear away!


Matt said to let all of my insecurities, fear and stress be burned away with the lighting of the candle. “This candle needs fuel to burn and we’re going to let the fuel be all of your insecurities and fears.” Every time I had a negative thought, he’d say “There it goes! Just burned away!”

After Matty left, I felt more confident, calm, self-assured and ready to take on my meetings full of promise!

Today as I did my daily morning gratitude and writing session, I lit my favorite Ruth Anaya candles. And as I did so, I said this prayer:
“With the lighting of this candle, let all of my fears, insecurities and stress be burned away.” 

Hope this helps you as much as Matty helped me!

Such a wonderful way to start a busy week!




BF Asks: How do you reduce your stress, fears and insecurities? 

BF QOD: Let everyone know what you want so they can help you…

BF QOD: Let everyone know what you want so they can help you...

“Make up your mind what you want to be and what you want to do. Then take every path that might lead in that direction. Let everyone know what you want so they can help you. And they will. Be definite and determined. After a while, they see you are determined and you’re going to do it, and they will help you because they want to be a part of it.”

(Hank Cochran)

No one likes asking for help. It’s never easy to ask your friends to “Like” your Facebook page or follow you on Twitter or come to your show/store/etc.

But you have to.

It’s part of this thing that is life.
You ask others to be part of your journey and you are part of theirs.
And it makes the world a much happier place to live.

When I need to remember this, I just read the quote above that my friend, Chris, gave me and I get a little peace about it all.




BF QOD: Mary Oliver knows…


BFQOD: Mary Oliver knows...

“I want to think again of dangerous and noble things. I want to be light and frolicsome. I want to be improbable, beautiful and afraid of nothing as though I had wings.”

(Mary Oliver)

So what’s stopping you?


BF QOD: An oldie but goodie by Eleanor Roosevelt…

BF QOD: A classic

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face… Do the thing you think you cannot do.” (Eleanor Roosevelt)

BF QOD by the miraculous Marianne Williamson: “Our deepest fear…” YES!!


BF QOD by the miraculous Marianne Williamson: "Our deepest fear..."

The first time I read this, I cried.

It hit me. Hard.

But in the best possible spot.

Right. In. My. Soul.

I hope it has the same effect on you, dear beauties.




BF Asks: What is your deepest fear? p.s. Whatever it may be, NEVER let it immobilize you.